Cozies are made out of things that do not generally last until the end of time. Sooner or later, you need to put your cozy out to pasture. But how do you know? Here are some signs to look for:

1 Ineffectual as a Cozy

The main purpose of a cozy is to keep the teapot warm. Sure, there are some who see other uses, but when it comes to this main one, if the cozy is no longer able to deliver and becomes ineffectual at this task, it’s a key sign and so is listed as the first one to look for.

2 Taking on Some Decidedly Unattractive Features

Quilted cozies have been known to develop holes where their batting peeks through the outer cloth. Knitted cozies can get ripped or frayed so that they start to have little yarn ends poking out here and there or unravel altogether (and all the knit-one-purl-two can’t put them back together again). Burn marks are another eyesore, usually occurring during a candlelit tea time.

3 Excessive Tea Stains

You’d think this would be part of #2 above, but I wanted to point it out separately here, since a stained tea cozy is one of the most egregious things to happen to a teaware. First, it wastes tea, which belongs in a cup so it can delight your tastebuds. Second, it makes the cozy look unkempt and even uncared for. One reason such staining occurs, I think is that cozies, like tea towels, tend to get thirsty.

4 No Longer Fits Over the Teapot

Unlike when your pants “shrink” in the dryer (actually caused by you gaining weight so that the pants no longer fit right), cozies really do shrink. It happens when you wash them (trying to get rid of those tea stains and a jam glob or two that got on them when you didn’t clean off your fingers before picking up the cozy) and then dry them using the high heat setting on your dryer (which can make any Velcro fasteners on the cozy deteriorate faster).

5 Actually Looks Like a Hat When You Wear It

Comedian Bill Connelly states, “Never trust a man, who when left alone with a tea cozy… doesn’t try it on.” He meant that they try it on as a hat. Now, normally this looks rather odd and very unhatlike. When the cozy begins to take on the actual shape of a hat, things have gone too far.

What to do when your cozy exhibits one or more of these signs? Go shopping, of course!

See more of A.C. Cargill’s articles here.

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