Once again we pour the water of time into the kettle of knowledge and boil; carefully allow it to cool to the correct temperature for May 2011 before brewing the tea of truth. Earl Grey will be my spirit guide this month as we decipher what the leaves have to tell us.
In the bottom of my Winnie the Pooh mug I was able to discern the following mystical portents – an ankh, a bunch of balloons, an iron, a spoon, a broom, a bed, an apple and, finally, an eye. A big, creepy eye looking at me from the bottom of my mug in an ominous fashion.
The ankh is a symbol of renewal and abundance while balloons mean an improvement in your life provided you are careful and do the right thing. Good things will happen in May if we can just try to behave ourselves and are careful not to let go of the strings.
An iron is the ability to smooth out relationship problems, a spoon means generosity, and a broom can be the disappearance of small worries. If you have been arguing with your significant other, then now is the time to suck up, volunteer to do the chores and earn maximum brownie points for the rest of the month.
The bed symbolises inertia, and an apple means business achievements and prosperity. Either Steve Jobs is about to run out of ideas, or it’s time to put some more effort into your career. The leaves really seem to want us to be virtuous this month; if we all put our heads down for now, hopefully they’ll be more lenient in June.
Finally, there’s the big creepy eye which can only mean one thing: the gaze of Sauron is upon us. If any of you have been holding onto the one ring of power, then if you could just toss it into a volcano, you’d be doing us all a real favour.
So in summary, this is the month to behave if you fancy being rewarded, and it might be prudent to stay away from Mordor and lend a hand to any hobbits who cross your path.
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