Tea and a Good Rant

The other day a Twitter pal posted her rant about some of the drivers out there who are — well — uh — less than well-mannered on the road. She pointed out a number of things I have experienced, too, just when driving to stores or the Post Office. It’s a madhouse out there on the streets sometimes! I needed a pot and a half of Autumn Flush Darjeeling to restore my equilibrium just from reading her rant.

My buddy Little Yellow Teapot steeped up some Spring Pouchong for our rant session! (Photo source: A.C. Cargill, all rights reserved)
My buddy Little Yellow Teapot steeped up some Spring Pouchong for our rant session! (Photo source: A.C. Cargill, all rights reserved)

Oooo…that gives me an idea. People pair foods, cheeses, and chocolates with tea. Some even pair books, movies, and sports events with tea. So, why not pair tea and a good rant?

Step 1: Pick a topic on which to rant. No shortage these days. From grammar gaffes that can drive folks like me up the wall (“It’s ‘20 items or fewer’, not ‘20 items or less’!”), to people who take up two parking spaces for no other reason than that they are terrible parkers, to those annoying voice recognition systems on customer help lines (they never seem to recognize my voice).

Step 2: Key in on the main aspects that are annoying, nonsensical, or downright maddening. Some people can’t stand those shorteners used on Twitter, Facebook, cell phone text messages, and even emails. What the heck is ROFL, LOL, IMO, IMHO, and “r u”? Grrr! (Actually, I looked ‘em up: “Rolling On The Floor Laughing,” “Laughing Out Loud,” “In My Opinion,” “In My Humble Opinion,” and “are you.”) Other folks will decry not only the grammatically incorrect sign at that “20 items or fewer” checkout lane but also that almost routinely the person ahead of them has 30 or 40 items and the cashier says nothing about it to them. (Remember that scene in You’ve Got Mail where Meg Ryan’s character is in the cash only line and trying to use a credit card? Everyone in the movie audience was probably cheering when Tom Hanks got the cashier to let her use her credit card. Now, what kind of public example is that setting?)

Step 3: Select a tea to go with the general mood of your rant. I tend to need a bracing cuppa something strong, and Assam, either straight or in a Breakfast Blend, or some Yunnan Black, or even a rich, flavorful Kenyan blend such as Devonshire Tea, are needed. However, you might want something more mellow, like a light Japanese Sencha, a Spring (First) Flush Darjeeling, or even a bit of Spring Pouchong (my review). Make your selection, steep some up and get ready to rant.

Step 4: Rant!

When your rant is done, you may not have changed anything, but you will certainly feel better, especially since you will be full of tasty tea — and whatever go-with snack you had with that tea. Rant on!

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